


Once upon a time, there were no strippers, but lots of influence…

by uddelhexe



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Fanfiction Contest, Fun, Gabriel comes back, Gen, I didn't win..sniff, Inuedos, One Shot, Purgartory Convention 5 Contest, Reference to the famous influence Panel misha and Jared, influence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-09
Updated: 2019-05-09
Packaged: 2020-02-29 03:12:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18770035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uddelhexe/pseuds/uddelhexe
Summary: If Cas can annoy The Empty until he is thrown out...what can Gabriel do?Why a wet Dean is not happy to see him...Why Castiel doesn't think Dean should share his reading material.Why Sam likes his influence.





	Once upon a time, there were no strippers, but lots of influence…

**Author's Note:**

> This was a one shot that should not be longer then 6 pages and without explizit content.
> 
> Reason was a FanFiction Contest at Purgartory Convention 5 in Germany in 2019.  
> Sadly i did not win
> 
> I need a hug and kudos!

* * *

 

„Get the hell out of here!“ 

For a place without walls, the hollow surrounding him was able to reverberate the sound of the rasping and unnerving voice quite a lot. 

“Why? Don’t you enjoy my company?” 

“Out!” 

“Oh, c’mon! You felt it too, right? That spark? The magic? “ Eye-wiggle “Between you and me?”

 

Despite the fact that there was no light around, he could see the idea of a shadow creeping closer to his form and coming to an abrupt halt just in front of him. If there had been true space, it may have touched where his nose used to be, breathed in the same air, and somehow he knew that the other was frowning mimicking an annoyed frown.

Something deep inside of him, call it a small core of reason, that he hadn’t talked to in a while, told him he should be afraid, maybe respectful even, but what he thought was: _What can it possibly to do me?_ Bore me to death even more?

He highly doubted it.

With the biggest grin he could muster and confidence showing in his imaginary features, he didn’t truly feel, he glanced at the entity in front of him.

 

“Thousands of years you halos died in piece. I collected what was rightfully mine and got you to a sound sleep in my realm. Everything was fine. Everything was peaceful. Everything was silent. What is it with you lately to stand up, walk around and annoy me to no end?”

 

“Hell, how would I know?” Which was true, because he didn’t.

 

“You are the third to awake and the second I want to spit out before I get sick. Had I known that my existence would become THIS, I’d never agreed to God to create out of me in the first place! But he was so loud too! Whining and writhing, because he was bored…shouting for a universe to be born. It was awful. He and his sister were fighting and yelling and yada-yada… and I just wanted it to stop! Gave him a place to create…gave him the soldiers he needed…but did it stop? **NO**!”

Maybe he was imagining it, but the soundless voice had pitched up a notch while talking and it tasted like an emotional wave born out of utter despair mixed with a great deal of tired annoyance.

 

“Shall I call you Grandpa then,” was what he said. Perhaps he should just stop was, what he thought.

 

If it was possible to stare a deathly hole into a nonexistent head with nonexistent eyes…this would be the moment for it to happen. But it didn’t. Instead a mind-storm was rising and he felt that it began to pull at his very being.

 

“Grandma?” _Shut up, Chuckdamnit!_

 

“ **OUT!** ”

 

With a mental finger-gun pointing on the dark entity in front of him, Gabriel slipped out of the Empty. Later he wasn’t sure about this, but maybe he’d blinked at his possible Grandparent as a last Goodbye and to remind it, that it was the wisest decision to never bother him again.

He just hoped that he would land in a pool. Preferably with lots of strippers in it.

 

* * *

 

Close enough.

 

“ **WHAT THE FRIGGIN HELL**?”

 

Ok. Maybe a pool with strippers had been a bit much to ask. But he had do admit, that this was the second best version of a great Entrance, that he could’ve wished for. With closer inspection it was even better than the strippers, because after weeks of utter boredom in the Empty he sure as hell needed some fun to cheer him up and bring him back to his old self.

And what was laid out before him was simply the funniest thing he’d seen in a very long time.

 Water: _Check!_

Pool? _Nah, bathtub...close enough: Check!_

Naked strippers: no, but…a high pitched screaming and very naked Winchester with ears as red as tomatoes, splashing out of a tub in pure terror…slipping… falling out of said tub with face first on the floor and blank butt raised to Gabriel’s face : Fucking Priceless!

 

“I’m happy to see you too, Dean-O!”

 

A deep growl and some animalistic grunts emerged from the knawel made of limps that was trying to entangle himself between floor and bathtub, nearly touching the Archangel’s feet in the process.

Dean tried to bring his feet under him, his ass down and safe the remnants of his dignity in front of the archangel that just had materialized in the bunkers big bathroom in which, in all honesty, he really only had needed some grown-up alone time for just five fucking minutes.

Luckily there was no bigger Alone-time-mood-breaker than a smirking Gabriel standing inches away from him, Lollipop stuffed in his grinning visage and hands in his pockets.

Dean couldn’t even bring himself to be surprised about the Why, but decided he should ask anyway.

 

“Shouldn’t you be dead or something?” he grumbled while fumbling for the towel next to the sink.

 

“I know you missed me, Freckles. You can just say so!”

 

Once Dean had managed to hide his private parts from the view of the snarky angel, he raised and tried to compose himself. It was time to find back to his professional self and figure out, where Gabriel had been and how in Chuck’s name he had managed to escape the Apocalypse world. And last but not least: why the heck wasn’t he a rotting corpse with some nice burn-painted wings on both sides of him.

 

“Does Castiel know that you’re here?” A tiny voice inside of his head, not Michael he hoped, gave rise to concern: was this figure standing in front of him truly the Archangel or just a very nasty picture provided by his growing stress level?

 

“No.”

 

“Then why don’t we find him and my brother and you start to tell us what happened? AND we bring you up to date with the Michael-problem AND how your Nephew could use your help for once.”

Gabriel sighed and chewed on his Lollipop, rolled it around in his mouth and his shoulders slumped down slightly: “You fucked it up, didn’t you?”

 

“Shut up and follow me”, Dean murmured sourly.

 

Gabriel waved his hand in a gracious gesture to show Dean the way out of the bathroom. The annoyed hunter batted his hand away and stomped out into the corridor, muttering something that didn’t sound too happy.

 Gabriel sighed.

 

* * *

 

 

“You’re kidding me!”

 

“Does this,” Dean pointed at his own face with his index-finger and drew a circle around his features,” look like the face of someone having fun?” Neither Sam, nor Castiel made any attempt to reveal the news as one big joke.

“So you said Yes to Psycho-Michael?” Silent nod. “And he went all Thanos-the World-destroyer after he killed Lucy?” Angry Nod. “And now he’s stuffed into that nut of yours, sitting at a bar, trying to come out and at the same time a spell is feeding of my nephews soul, because my beloved evil-brother Lulu, ripped out his sons grace to eat it and you had to stabilize is body, is that about right?”

 

“Sound about right.”

 

“I suddenly regret coming back. What….30 minutes with the Winchesters and i already have a strong and gnawing death wish. You know what Chuckle-brigade? I need a break, some fresh air, to process this, think of something to rescue your asses…AGAIN…and then plan a trip to Hawaii and drown myself in Tequila and hopefully forget that this is my life now!”

With that said Gabriel shot up from his chair at the War-table and stormed out of the room. The hunters, Castiel and Jack looked at each other helplessly.

“He could actually help us. Perhaps heal Jack…help us to bring down Michael. Should we let him go?” Sam asked carefully. Dean began to knit his temples. There was a certain headache developing inside of on him again.

When the silent sound of helplessness tried to settle in, Castiel took pity on the others and rose from his sitting position.

 

“I’ll talk to him.” He offered helpfully.

 

Jack still looked a bit confused and still watched the way Gabriel had left the room. Eyebrows pinched, wondering.

 

“What’s the matter kiddo, “Dean asked the Nephilim.

 

“Dean, isn’t the way to get fresh air, “Jack air-quoted his description visibly and then continued speaking,” that direction?” With that said the young man pointed to the stairs leading to the main-door of the bunker.

            With no further warning Dean shot up and began to run towards their bedrooms. Specifically the exact same direction Gabriel had taken to leave the room to “think”.

 

“GABRIEL! DON’T YOU DARE TOUCHING MY STUFF AGAIN **!”**

 

Jack watched Dean jumping like a panicked rabbit and seemed even more puzzled. He looked at Castiel and Sam for help and further explanation. Sam chuckled and Castiel appeared to be one second away from face-palming himself, whilst perfectly impersonating an “I’m-so-fucking-done”-Meme.

Sam decided to illuminate his surrogate-son: “Dean and Gabriel share the passion for the same reading material. And Dean is not so fond of Gabriel touching…his magazines…in hid room.”

 

“Why not?”

“You know what? Why don’t you ask Dean about this, when he comes back? I’m sure he will love to explain his reading preferences to you,” Sam added with a joyful and not at all wicked grin.

            Castiel felt the urge to throw in his own five cents into that debate. At the end, Kelly had told him to watch over her son…and debating Dean’s “preferences” was nothing he thought to be helpful for Jack’s education yet…or ever.

“I don’t think the influence of Dean’s bed lecture is something that will be beneficial to your mental health, Jack,” he told his son very seriously, very calmly, earning a snicker from Sam beside him. And because Sam was not a total asshole the younger Winchester added in all honesty:

“You know what? He’s right! Better let Cas and me influence you. We read a lot of really good books. We like to try out new ways of thinking and techniques. He influenced me a lot and vis versa. And I dare to say that this made us full with….with…new abilities to look at the world. To be influenced like that can be a very satisfying process.”

 

Jack nodded in understanding and smiled happily.

Castiel cleared his throat and started to walk towards the bedroom section of the bunker.

 

“I’ll have a look if the two of them have killed each other already. It is suspiciously quite over there.”

 

“Or they finally came together about the magazines…Wait. That sounded different in my mind. I didn’t mean…you know…just…better knock before you enter that room.”

 

Jack luckily was completely oblivious to accidental innuendos but Cas rolled his eyes dramatically: “That was very inappropriate, Sam.”

 

Sam outright laughed at Castiel with high amusement and shook his head. It always was too much fun to get such a reaction from the otherwise stoic angel.

 

He sat back and realized that he actually was happy to have Gabriel back with the living and also in this realm. With him in tow, they could have a chance to fight Michael and help Jack…well even the problem in heaven could become more accessible with an Archangel willing to help.

 

And if nothing else…since Gabe was getting along with Castiel better than ever, they at least would have more friends to fight with and perhaps even more family to count on.


End file.
